clementines and coffee

ridicly legit

2010-07-22T23:44:00.002-04:00

i have been using ridic and legit way too much.

but really, this is ridic. how am I supposed to fulfill assignments in 20 minutes? these people have no concept of time. and meanwhile on the other side i have family obligations, dude. mom got upset at me because she thought i purposely neglected the laundry to be on the computer. when really i'm just trying my best to frantically find people to be in the boat competition. you know what? if we did everything earlier i wouldn't be stuck in this position all the time. time management! come on people. no more last minute things, please. this is totally ridic. i spent my whole evening doing encampment staff. this is not what i asked for.

my shell

2010-07-08T23:38:00.002-04:00

I've always lived in it. My shell seems to shield me from blows and and attacks. When I venture out I'm bombarded with hurt. So I only sneak out when I think no one will notice. I go out with my defenses high to protect me. Maybe that's what attracts them. Knowing that I'm afraid, they come after me. And I retreat, crawling, beaten, broken.

dear Lord,

2010-07-05T00:21:00.001-04:00

thank you for all my amazing friends. I am so grateful that you have put them in my life to bless me and love me. so so grateful. And that's all I can say.

It's been a good day.

true friends

2010-07-03T12:08:00.005-04:00

So my first day as an 18-year-old was...uneventful. I spent a good bit of time replying to Facebook posts. ::grin:: You can judge for yourself whether that was a good use of time. Let's just say that's the last time I'll be doing that.

Another big chunk of time I used to prepare my CW lesson. It's coming along pretty well. I was a little overwhelmed with too many thoughts. I think I have a lot to say, too much, in fact, for half an hour. So I just sat on the deck in the beautiful evening weather after dinner and stared at the sky and talked to God. It was restful and refreshing. :) And now I think it's gelling quite well. Thank you Jesus. My title is "~~Characteristics~~ Qualities of a True Friend." I tried coming up with something more catchy but they all turned out corny, so I decided to choose substance over style lol. I'm unsure as to whether I should write the whole thing out or just put down points. I have a tendency of saying things the wrong way when I don't have a script...

yeah I'm ready. except for the audience reaction part. I know a lot of those kids, worked with them in choir and other places. And apparently they really like me for some reason. I have a fan club of sorts. It's strange. Another one of those "what did I do to deserve this" things. So I'm afraid of their accepting whatever I say as truth just because it's me saying it. What if I say the wrong thing or mislead them?

side note: I'm not a fan of unaddressed rants because they're so immature and pointless but I need to vent here so yeah. It hurts that you didn't notice at all. not even a fb post? come on. yeah I know the majority of people on fb don't really care anyway but at least they took the time to type it. I guess I don't mean much to you. Whatever used to be between us just died. Thanks for killing it. but you know I guess there was never much. analyzing "true friendship" made me realize we don't have much in common. I'll never understand you and you don't wanna get me so forget it.

a vote of confidence

2010-07-01T08:41:00.002-04:00

I totally wasn't expecting that award yesterday. I didn't even know we had "Staff Member of the Month" awards. Going up to get my MRE, I felt the way I feel whenever I'm in the spotlight - do I really deserve this? What if they find out I'm not as good as I seem? In the past few months I feel like I've messed up way too many times. Missed deadlines, incomplete reports, spotty communication, not motivating my department enough, losing a cadet, not responding to Untisz's texts. I think a some people on staff deserved this more than me. I mean, staff reports everyday? Now that's dedication. Though it's true I was doing encampment work on vacation...thanks to the time difference I handed in my staff report on time LOL. otherwise it would've been late.

But anyway, I think that's how I live my whole life. What if people find out I'm a sham? I'm not, I think. But I always feel pressure that people think I'm better or smarter and more talented and more capable than I really am. And I can't even say it's humility that makes me think that. It's pride. I have pride in my...reputation...or what people think of me. I'm afraid of "losing face" if people were to see me fail. Or maybe I'm so used to being seen as a success that I know the day I fail I'll fall hard. It would probably take years to rebuild my "image." Man it sounds like my "image" is all I care about. It's not, really. I didn't even set out to build up this "image" for myself. It just...happened.

And now all this talk about "image" is making me think about how what I've been reading in How to Stay Christian in College about the basics of Christianity and how we're created in the image of God. (Shout out to Magistra for the awesome book!)

Hmm maybe that's it. That's the "image" I need to strive for. The way people view me should be reflective of the character of Christ. And that's an image that's not a sham. I have nothing to hide or worry about people discovering because my whole life gels into a seamless story.

You know when you know you know something, but you forget it or don't think about it for a while and then suddenly BAM! it hits you again and you're like, I knew that...how did I every forget it...that's exactly what I need to hear right now?

Yeah that's how I feel right now.

sometimes all you can do is pray

2010-06-26T00:13:00.002-04:00

I feel like my spirit's suffocating here in HK and Shanghai. Lord, I need you to fill me, to satisfy me! How did I become this beastly person? Fill me, Lord.

I don't feel ready to teach in Children's Worship next week. Pray for me?

hello again

2010-05-26T20:14:00.004-04:00

So it's the end of my senior year and I've decided to revisit my blog. yeah. I've had a lot to say since I last blogged, but most of it was too stupid to reveal to the world. What was left I decided to keep to myself in my journal. But right now I feel this urge to get it all out so here goes. To whoever's reading this: it's gonna be random.

It's amazing to know that my parents always have my best interests at heart. Too often I flare up at their chastising or brush off their warnings. Then looking back, wow...I'm glad I avoided that pain. Sometimes I feel like an eagle tethered to a cliff, unable to take flight but seeing and smelling and tasting all the freedom beckoning to me. I fight and fight against what's holding me back, I want to break free, I want to experience life! But then I look around and I see all the other birds flying around, some soaring, some floating on the wind, and some plummeting down the deep canyon. And I know in my bird-brain that I'm safer where I am. On the other end of the rope are my caretakers, the ones who protect me and teach me, the ones who know when it's best to let me go. They know when I'm ready to face the hurt, the ugliness, the dark lure of the river below.

For the past few months I've been learning a lot. about life in general. Life, love, people. No, maybe it's love I'm talking about. Love, and how it relates to God. Love, and how it relates to people. Love, and how it relates to myself. Love. I overuse that word. It's lost its meaning for me. I want to regain it, repossess it. Love.

[I just looked up and noticed there's a new tab on the blogger dashboard - "Monetize". Way to disturb my train of thought.]

I crave love because I do not see the Savior's love. It is not real enough for me. I want "love" from people because my heart is closed to Jesus' great love. I do not know it. And so I seek to fill it up with sinful people. People who can give me no more than a word of affection or a reaction to my conversation, making me feel valued...for a second. Lord, I'm frustrated. Tired of broken promises. Wipe away all these distractions that pull me away from you. Fill me and show me that you are greater than my need.

whoa...I totally did not expect to go there. But that's okay. I just watched Tenth Avenue North's video blog on "Healing Begins." I guess this is my way of starting to crack open the shell I've been hiding in this year.

virtuosity is...

2009-02-05T23:29:00.002-05:00

flawlessly playing a 16th-note passage in F# major (6 sharps) at fortissimo e il piu Presto possibile. did I mention executing it flawlessly?

if you have no idea what that gobbledy-gook is about, just watch this and be amazed.

anxiety is...

2009-01-31T10:56:00.001-05:00

...wondering what exactly it is you just sucked into the voluminous depths of your vacuum cleaner.

The clickety-clackety-whoosh sound is just too much for me sometimes.

malayalam is a palindrome

2009-01-09T17:54:00.003-05:00

disclaimer: this is not a coherent post. it is a sampling of what I've been thinking about for the past few days.

I have concluded that Barnes&Nobles is for yuppies. Everything is insanely overpriced. blechness.

Why are there so many Starbucks? On one stretch of Route 1, there's a Starbucks in the B&N, and another Starbucks right across Route 1. My parents have tried to explain the "logic" of it to me, (so you don't have to make a u-turn...what kind of logic is that?), but I think it's entirely bad marketing.

Why am I so afraid of being wrong?

The most awkward thing ever is what I call walking-down-a-long-empty-hallway-oh-look-there's-S_____-should-i-say-hi-now-or-wait-till-i-get-to-her-do-i-look-at-her-stare-at-her-or-ignore-her-till-i'm-there-hey-whew-it's-over.

Why is there so much guesswork involved in relationships? The overly-idealistic part of me wishes we could all be straightforward and say what we really feel. But I guess we might end up with even more broken relationships if we really said everything we really feel.

Why is it that I feel some people don't mean it when they say, "I really don't care what part I get. I'm fine with anything."? I can totally sense that they would not be fine if they were cast as The Servant.

My pet peeve is when people spell "definitely" "definately". ugh.

Grandmothers are wonderful! I love love love my mah-mah. Do you know, I recently found out she contracted malaria when she was a teenager. She survived without hospitalization or special medication. it's so awesome to see how God's hand was on her throughout her life.

oh, and about the title of the post-- David showed me that Malayalam is a palindrome on Tuesday and I've been thinking about it ever since. My brain thinks it's the coolest thing ever.

resolutions, 4 days late

2009-01-04T17:20:00.002-05:00

I haven't done New Year's Resolutions in a couple years. I used to think there was no point to them since I gave up on them a month into the new year. But I decided to make some today during first service. (I was paying attention to Pastor Wilson, I really was.) I don't have a deep, important reason for suddenly changing my mind to be for resolutions. I don't have big, ambitious goals. But here they are anyway.

1. I resolve to read through the entire Bible with my brother.
2. I resolve to journal at least once a week.
3. I resolve to do my math joyfully.
4. I resolve to treat my parents and brother with more respect.
5. I resolve to fill my mind with good, noble things, not the dirt of this world.
6. I resolve to carefully cultivate my relationship with God, and not treat him as an afterthought.

What are your goals for 2009?

growing pains

2008-12-31T09:38:00.004-05:00

Consider this my year-end reflection post. Something I've never done.

2008 has passed by very quickly. Why is it that the older I get, the faster time seems to go?

I've been thinking more about things that matter. Maybe because I turned 16 this year and that feels like such an old age. So close to 18. If you think about it, I've probably lived one-fifth of my life. And what do I have to show for it? What have I done to advance God's kingdom?

I guess this year, one big thing for me was relationships. Of all kinds. A lot of my friendships have changed more in this one year than ever before. Everyone is growing up and changing. I still believe in kindred spirits, though. It’s almost as if you’ve got a deeper connection than just friendship, with certain people. It’s just that the outer veneer has cracked and reshaped itself. And that can hurt. Hence the title of this post: growing pains.

Sometimes I feel like not having a facebook limits my ability to “connect” with people I don’t see regularly. But then, I think, do I really need to know that S_____, whom I met last year at summer camp, went to a party last week and got drunk? Nah. The most important relationships are the ones where we can talk face to face.

Or at least voice to voice. This year God has been slowly, slowly revealing to me how important he is. How he is the one who gives me strength when I can’t run on my own power anymore. How only he can comfort me when everything seems to be going wrong. How his love can satisfy me and I needn’t go thirsting after attention from boys. But sometimes I’ve rejected his nudging. It’s like he’s wooing me and I just ignore and reject the great God of the Universe. I mean, wow, he has so many things to take care of and yet he takes the time to pursue an intimate relationship with me.

So after all that talk about relationships I sort of feel obligated to say that I’m not in a relationship with a guy. Which all of my readers probably know. Haha. Whether you care or not.

Change hurts. Sometimes I wish things would just stay the same. But say, if I never changed I’d be a horrible person. I’m learning to be glad that God is molding me through hard times. And compared to many people, I don’t suffer at all. These are just growing pains.

Romans 5:1-5

1Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. 3Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

Happy New Year!

what not to get me for Christmas

2008-12-22T16:27:00.002-05:00

I am now the proud owner of three blue-and-red scarves, none of which I bought myself. Please don't give me a fourth.

Just had to get that out there. :D

comments fixed

2008-12-11T18:03:00.003-05:00

Thanks to the people who pointed out the problem with the comment function. It should be fixed now. Happy commenting! =]

strange questions

2008-12-09T23:06:00.003-05:00

Today I was at the dentist's office for my biannual cleaning. The hygienist was chatting away as she prepared me for the x-ray.

"How old are you now?" She asked.

"I'm sixteen," I replied, as she came over with the protective vest thingy.

"Are you pregnant?"

"Excuse me?"

"Are you pregnant?" She repeated, looking very earnest.

"Uh...no?"

See that I was a bit shocked at the question, she explained, "You're sixteen, so I just have to check if you're pregnant."

"Uh...okay..."

What a mess our world has become! Just because I'm sixteen, I am assumed to have had sex and possibly be pregnant?

be still, my soul

2008-11-30T19:23:00.001-05:00

Be still, my soul; the Lord is on thy side;
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain;
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul; thy best, thy heavenly, Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.

Be still, my soul; thy God doth undertake
To guide the future as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence, let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul; the waves and winds still know
His voice who ruled them while He dwelt below.

Be still, my soul, though dearest friends depart
And all is darkened in the vale of tears;
Then shalt thou better know His love, His heart,
Who comes to soothe thy sorrows and thy fears.
Be still, my soul; thy Jesus can repay
From His own fulness all He takes away.

Be still, my soul; the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord,
When disappointment, grief, and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love's purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul; when change and tears are past,
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last.

~ Catharina von Schlegel, transl. Jane Borthwick

thanksgiving

2008-11-26T11:23:00.003-05:00

I give thanks to the Lord for the millions and billions of blessings he has showered me with. From family to friends, to pianos, to books, to the ability to sing, to mashed potatoes, it's overwhelming when I think about it.

But most importantly, I want to thank you, Jesus. What greater thing do I have than my Jesus? Many things compete for #1, but let me never remove Jesus from that spot. Lord, keep my eyes fixed on you. You only. Only Jesus.

Have a blessed Thanksgiving!

fuzzy logic

2008-11-25T23:25:00.001-05:00

"Frowning takes more energy than smiling or being expressionless...so let's all frown to get more exercise!"

~My brother

mood swings

2008-11-23T16:37:00.002-05:00

Laugh cry scream. Shiver.
I get these sudden urges.
Laughing fits.
Or this deep sorrowful feeling within me that makes me want to sob.
Or a suppressed scream needing to come out.

Why?

Let it come out.

Are performances merely acts? Or can you really be you on stage? I felt it last night when I was singing Sorrow. Was that really me or just an imitation?

that warm, fuzzy feeling

2008-11-13T00:10:00.004-05:00

Whenever I start feeling sad or discouraged or mopey, I think of one of the most wonderful things anyone has ever said to me -

"You know, Serenity, whenever I hear or say your name, it makes me think of music."

A little 7-year-old boy from church. Isn't that simply heart-warming?

lifted from soulvessel

2008-11-08T10:50:00.002-05:00

top ten reasons to live other than God, family, and friends.

mashed potatos
Glenn Gould
scones
tea
cold fingers
snow
Chopin
pretending to do tai-chi
foam swords
Steinway grands

in your face

2008-10-22T12:32:00.002-04:00

According to this chart (go to the very bottom), 14% of college students* do not have a Facebook. So I may be in the minority there, but at least there's sizable amount of people keeping me company. Take that, all you fbers who take every opportunity to convince me to get a Facebook.

The other charts are very interesting too. I guess the statistics don't surprise me, considering the moral, political, and social views held by many of the college students I know. Though if 60% of students are concerned about the moral direction of our country, then why don't they do something about it?

*yeah, I know I'm not a college student. I would think that the statistics for hs students are similar.

i know now why i used to hate poetry

2008-10-03T16:56:00.002-04:00

I have always been a fast reader. That is not a boast, merely a statement of a fact. In first grade at private school I finished my whole reader about a month into the school year. Reading time was terribly boring after that. I go through books much like the way I go through apples. First I carefully peel the skin off, then I chomp my way through the meat without having to worry about the peel getting stuck in my teeth. I read the first few chapters carefully, to get a feel for the author's style, then I zoom through to the end so I know what happens to the characters.

But you can't do that in poetry. You'll miss the point.

Because in poetry, every word counts. There is not a single syllable that is extraneous. (unless, of course, you are an amateur trying too hard) You must read slowly, carefully, tossing the words around in your mouth, moving them to your brain, feeling them in your heart. If you miss one word, you could be missing the most important word in the poem, the punchline, the moral of the fable.

Now that I am older and have less time to read for pleasure, I find myself reading more slowly. Since I won't get through the book in a day anyway, I might as well read every single word. And that is why I have come to appreciate poetry for what it is, not just what it gives me.

Fantasy

2008-09-30T22:45:00.002-04:00

i Want that which
i Cannot have.
it Cannot be
Done.

i Desire it
with All my heart.
from All of it,
Run.

new ksb tour blog

2008-06-22T23:40:00.001-04:00

KSB has a new tour blog because the old one died. And they have pictures up!

If you can't tell from the frequency of my posting, I'm really excited about the tour. =D They're in Paris right now!

Keystone State Boychoir on tour!

2008-06-19T22:13:00.003-04:00

As most of you reading know, my brother's choir went on tour today. They're on the plane to Heathrow Airport, London right now.

I missed Stephen for about 24 seconds, as we were walking away from the airport, then I felt fine. =D I'm sure I'll miss him later though. My mum and I sat in the IKEA restaurant waiting to see the plane take off...but then neither of us were quite sure what the British Airways logo looks like, so we don't know if we saw the plane or not.

So the main purpose of this entry is to get y'all to read KSB's tour blog for updates on what they're doing over in Europe. They'll be touring Monaco, France, Germany, Austria, and Bulgaria. Jealous yet? =)

on friendship

2008-06-16T22:33:00.000-04:00

I feel like I don't know you anymore
Where have all the old days gone?
Why are you so distant -
Dare I say it - inconsistent

We used to talk
Once I knew your heart
Now there's a darkness
I can't feel what you're feeling

When the world has gone dark
You are gone with it
I can't trust you
Can't rely on you

Will it ever be the same?
Whispers of crushes and emotions
Is this what growing up is like?
Let's pretend we're still twelve

I'm helpless, powerless to touch you
Let go - leave it to God
Just know this, Sister -
I'm praying for you.

Written in a moment of teenage-angsty weakness, so I'm not sure if I mean all this. ;) If I ever become a pop singer, I'm gonna turn this into a song.

check it out!

2008-05-30T21:46:00.003-04:00

The 2008 Scripps National Spelling Bee is coming to an exciting finish! Well, I'm guessing it's exciting...don't know for sure because we still don't have TV. My favorite, Matthew Evans, dropped out in the 6th round. =( But there's still one homeschooler left! Tia Thomas from California. So I'll be rooting for her and checking results frequently tonight.

I'm such a spelling bee geek. man, I wish we had TV so I could watch it.

btw, if you go to ABC.com and click on the link to the National Spelling Bee, in the second promotional video there's a shot of my hands. You'll recognize it by my ring. :P Pretty sweet.

edit: ok, excitement's over. Sameer Mishra from Indiana is the 2008 National Spelling Bee champ. Tia Thomas got 3rd place.

werboom

2008-04-27T19:38:00.003-04:00

It is said that a picture is worth a thousand words, but really, words are just as important. I mean, we talk with words, not pictures. Words have a lot of power, whether for good or bad. Proverbs says, "The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit."

I'm reminded many times daily by my mom to speak gently and kindly. Many, many times in a day. Curbing my tongue is really hard. That's probably why Scripture talks about the tongue so many times. A sampling from Proverbs:

A man who lacks judgment derides his neighbor, but a man of understanding holds his tongue. Proverbs 11:12

Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. Proverbs 12:18

Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent, and discerning if he holds his tongue. Proverbs 17:28

But it isn't only the words from our mouth that have great effect. What we write, or blog, in this digital age, can also influence people for good or bad.

I came across this article from Boundless recently. It talks about the importance of being gracious and truthful when writing online. I'd encourage all of my readers, even if you don't blog, to read the article in its entirety. It's a good reminder to us all to use our words carefully, especially if we claim to represent Christ.

One other thing that stood out to me from this article is that we should also be careful in our comments on other's blogs. Often I comment frivolously on my friend's blogs because I treat them as places where I can show off my wit or make silly jokes. In the process of trying to be "cool", I show myself to lack judgment.

I know I will never be able to completely control my tongue (or fingertips!), but I will strive to emulate Christ and speak with courtesy and wisdom. Will you join me?

happy Leap Year Day!

2008-02-29T11:57:00.004-05:00

I simply have to post today, even though I don't have much to say. After all, leap year only comes every four years. And by 2012 I'll probably have abandoned this blog.

Well, for the sake of saying something...

I heard on 99.1 this morning, in the car going to piano, that the 29th of February is the one day that ladies are free to propose marriage. From Radical Womanhood:

Today, I have the pleasure of introducing my friend, Erin Sutherland, who wrote a post for the New Attitude blog about the gospel and dating. You should note what is special about today, ladies! Once every four years, the tables are turned and legend has it that women are free to propose on Leap Year. As Erin writes:
Back in the 5th century, Saint Bridget complained to Saint Patrick that women were forced to wait too long for a marriage proposal. According to legend, St. Patrick set aside one day every four years so forlorn females could ‘pop the question.’ That day is February 29th. The tradition has found its way around the world; Scotland even made it a law in 1288—and any man who refused a proposal was required to pay a fine! The idea is: leap year can fix calendar problems, and ‘female proposal days’ can fix lack-of-marriage problems.

My brother's friend's parents got married on February 29th. ~~I wonder who proposed to whom...~~

Correction: marrying does not equal proposing, so I guess that sentence is irrelevant. Please excuse the mind blip. =D

teaching

2008-02-27T18:16:00.003-05:00

In the past few days, I've discovered for myself that teaching something is vastly different from just doing that something well.

How exactly does one convey how to be musical? It isn't something that can be taught. If you mimic it comes out manufactured. I'm sure by now my brother thinks I'm kooky or wrong in the head or something.

How do I show him that rubato isn't formulaic? It doesn't work like math!! AAHHHH!! Stop moving your body! Don't slow down before every other beat! Don't rush the eighth notes!! NO! You're marching again!

Of course it doesn't help that he thinks I'm scolding him when in fact I'm trying to help him.

And you know what the problem is? The problem is he's naturally musical, but he won't apply it!!!

I sound really hyperly angry, but I'm really not. I'm just really stuck trying to figure out how to help him.

lunar eclipse

2008-02-20T22:11:00.002-05:00

for you all who read this before the 20th is over, there's a Lunar Eclipse tonight. I mean, it's already happening. Full eclipse at 10:26. fyi.

my time stamp is absolutely off, so don't tell time by that.

unashamed

2008-02-19T20:16:00.009-05:00

I came upon this verse in 1 John 2:

(NIV) 28 And now, dear children, continue in him, so that when he appears we may be confident and unashamed before him at his coming. [emphases added]

(The Message) 28And now, children, stay with Christ. Live deeply in Christ. Then we'll be ready for him when he appears, ready to receive him with open arms, with no cause for red-faced guilt or lame excuses when he arrives. [emphasis added]

(CUV (Traditional)) 28 小子們哪，你們要住在主裡面。這樣，他若顯現，我們就可以坦然無懼；當他來的時候，在他面前也不至於慚愧。 [emphasis added]

There are two things that really stood out to me: one is that we should be confident and unashamed when we stand before Christ when he comes again. The second thing comes before in the verse, but it's actually telling us how to be confident and unashamed. Continue in him. Live deeply in Christ. 住在主裡面. I like the Chinese version, because it literally says we need to live inside Christ.

I'm glad today, because I know that Christ is my Redeemer. The one who makes me blameless and pure when I cannot do so on my own. The one who testifies on my behalf in front of the great Judge.

I'm also glad because our grand piano finally arrived! Beautiful, though rather out of tune. I'm extremely relieved that the movers got it safely up our [apparently] narrow stairs!

definition: Do Hard Things

2008-02-19T19:06:00.002-05:00

Per Art's suggestion, I've decided to link you to the Rebelution's definition of doing hard things. It's much more fleshed out than my attempts to define it. And they are the ones who came up with the whole idea.

Yay! Now I can finally blog regularly. I was stuck, very stuck, trying to write that post. Believe me, I started at least five times, on paper, on Word, on blogger. Maybe someday I'll post some of my thoughts.

2008

2008-01-01T17:43:00.001-05:00

2008. Harder to write than 2007. 8 has four curvies whereas 7 is just two straights.

Oh, Happy New Year, by the way. Almost forgot to say that.

Resolutions? Not me. I wouldn't keep them if I made them, so why make them? But I do hope to accomplish several things in 2008. Among them, blogging regularly (hopefully once a week), getting to know God better, inching, if not stepping, out of my comfort zone, and using my musical talents more fully. Note: I repeat, these are not resolutions. They are...something else. Can't find the right word.

I dub the year 2008 "Year of the Abbreviation." That reminds me, what's 2008 on the Chinese zodiac? According to my 50 year calendar, Year of the Rat. My brother's a rat.

Next post: definition: Doing Hard Things.

Do Hard Things

2007-12-18T17:07:00.000-05:00

Our dishwasher died. One day it started making really weird noises and flashing random lights in the display panel. When we opened it, it let off a wonderful burnt smell. The next day, we tried to use it. No lights flashed and it was still making weird noises. So now we are washing dishes by hand, like so many other Chinese people with working dishwashers do. They use dishwashers solely as drying racks.

I need to improve my vocabulary. My brother says I speak too teen-ish.

Why is it that 20-year-olds today cannot accomplish things that 15-year-olds in the past could do?

For those of you who don't believe what you read, the post below was indeed written by sehwoo.

meaningless

2007-12-12T23:17:00.000-05:00

Everything is meaningless. What does one get after working for days? What is anything after death? Everything that happened will happen again; people will die, people will be born.

Knowledge is nothing. Wisdom is nothing. Pleasure is nothing. Nothing is anything. The wise, the rich, the foolish, the poor. What's the difference when they're buried, rotting beneath the dirt. Why leave a name? Why be remembered? What is anything when you're dead?

Why toil? Why work? Things will break. Things will be undone. Things will die. There's pain. What has been done will be done again. The sun rises, the sun sets. The sun rises, the sun sets. Nations rise. Nations fall. Nations rise. Nations fall. Why wake if you will sleep again?

Why do anything. What's not done by you would simply be done by someone else.

There is no point. There is no point whatsoever. There is no point whatsoever at any time.

Life is just a shadow. Life is just a second. Life is just smoke; it's here and you smell it, then it's gone before you know it.

And during the shadow, what do we do? We strive to get things done.. We strive to be someone. We strive to make a name for ourselves.

But what is a name? What is a name when you're dead? Rotting away beneath the earth.. And nothing but a name.

What is the difference of being famous--or infamous? Why does it matter? Wouldn't you rather die knowing you did the right thing?

Why do we all spend hours over hours studying? And just sit down trying to know everything there is to know.. When we will all end up dead?

Why do we all spend hours over hours fooling around and having fun? And just chase after pleasures.. When we will all end up dead?

What privileges would you obtain in the grave? What difference does knowledge or foolishness have when you are dead?

We go. We chase after things not meant to be chased. And for what gain? Our name? For pride's sake?

There is only one thing worth doing. Only one thing worth being. Only one thing worth knowing. Only doing what's of God. Only being like Christ. Only knowing God is God, and you are not.

prince caspian trailer

2007-12-05T22:48:00.000-05:00

Just found this in my feeds: the trailer for Prince Caspian! I'm excited! can't wait for it to come out!!

dissatisfied

2007-10-27T18:49:00.001-04:00

Note: the below is an unfinished work and therefore is not fully understandable. as stated below, there is no impact, i.e. I have not given a satisfying conclusion to my thesis statement. please read as such.

I have learned, in a tangible way, that my wants will never be fully satisfied.

For the past few weeks, I've been simply aching to eat at Burger King. Yes, aching. Part of it because their fries are so much better than McDonalds' (yes they are. you know they are.) and partly because Stevie has been to BK several times without me.

So on Friday, we went to Burger King.

As soon as I stepped into the - I won't call it a restaurant, because really, it isn't - place, my achingness was diminished somewhat by the Halloween decorations all over the place. I abhor Halloween decorations.

Then, the lady got our order wrong. Man, she had some serious attitude.

Having removed all obstacles, we sat down to enjoy our whoppers and fries. And I discovered that I no longer take pleasure from eating fast food.

I had been longing to go to Burger King for the longest time, and now that I was actually there, I wished to be someplace else.

I sound so melodramatic. but really, the above is true. I just haven't found the punchline/impact.

My writing embarasses me, in a way. Even casual stuff like this. Writing reveals one's soul. vulnerability. that's why personal blogs are dangerous.

okay, this post is getting out of hand. I shall make like a choleric zebra and dash into the horizon. what's that you say? mixed metaphors and catachresis? terribly sorry for the brain damage, I take no responsibility.

lamentations of a chat-less soul

2007-10-20T19:37:00.000-04:00

cheesy, huh? really sad, too, you might add. how about melodramatic?

well. so my complaint is this. whenever I log onto google chat/talk/whatchamacallit, there are only boys on. and since I'm currently not allowed to chat with boys, except on business matters, i.e. debate, I have been chat-less for...a long time. WHY ARE YOU GIRLY PEOPLE NEVER ON WHEN I'M ON?

there. I'm done. chatting is really pointless. so it's not like I really care. just thought I'd let you know.

Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful. Proverbs 27:6

oh, the above verse has nothing to do with what is above the verse. really. I just wanted to share the verse. and I happened to smush two dissimilar things in one post.

oh frabjous day! calloo, callay!

2007-10-06T19:21:00.000-04:00

Now where did I read that today? I've been seeing that line pop up in quite a few places today. Lewis Carroll is really a very delightful author. I used to get him mixed up with C.S. Lewis. hehe...

hehe looks really really bad. No one laughs like "hehehehehe".

IKEA is a frabjous place. Especially the marketplace. My room finally looks a little more put together now, thanks to dark purple accents.

Some emails take a lot of energy and brain quota to write. I am very frustrated. Because you simply can't express emotion and tone of voice in typing, no matter how many emoticons you put in.

I have 24 bug bites. This is not right. Not right for October. No one living in Central Jersey should have to suffer from 24 bug bites in October.

Where did sin come from?

2007-09-23T19:12:00.000-04:00

That's part of what we discussed today in Sunday school. I never really thought of it.

Since God created everything, and sin falls under "everything", does that mean God created sin?

But then, why would he create something that he knew would be the bane of our lives?

The thing is, God created us in His image. And that means we are born with a free will. Free will is the choice to do right, or to do wrong. And because Adam chose to disobey God, his descendants are all inherently sinful.

Then you could argue, "If I were Adam, I wouldn't have disobeyed God. I would have resisted the serpent's temptation."

I don't know where I'm going with this. Let's go off on a tangent.

Why does it say, in Romans 5:12, that sin entered the world through one man? What about Eve? Wasn't she the one who first listened to the serpent?

Yes, but she was not a man. Man was created as the head of the family and to protect and take care of their family. Woman was made to help man as he led the family. So, because man had the greater responsibility, he took the greater blame.

I love asking questions. It really gets one thinking. That's how all philosophers come up with their ideas. Through questions. And sometimes answers. Not that I aspire in any way to become a philosopher. But aren't we all, in a way, philosophers? We all seek Truth, even if we do not admit it.

Today we had a candidate for the EC pastorate give a sermon. He comes from Texas. He said the phrases "kinda", "perhaps", "y'know", and "very much" very many times. And he used Powerpoint slides during his message. And a picture of David Crowder. And a video talking about "together".

I found out today that my dad has a Facebook. I was totally bowled over. I must be the only teen in my church who doesn't have a Facebook, but whose dad has one. It's usually the other way 'round.

I got a cute koala bear keychain thing today at Sunday school. I named him Jonas.

why I haven't posted in a long time

2007-09-04T18:15:00.000-04:00

Everyday I have loads of very interesting posts running through my mind, but by the time I'm free to computer, I've either forgotten them or they're no longer relevant. as in time-sensitive posts that I've delayed too long.

I just reread In His Steps by Charles Sheldon. It's a very good, challenging book. The phrase "What would Jesus do?" is thrown about so easily that no one really thinks what it means anymore. But really, asking oneself "Would Jesus do this?" before each action and thought is basically imitating Jesus, which is what we are told to do in the Bible. I must confess that many times I forget to ask myself this question, or I ask it, answer correctly, and act differently. Perhaps this is due to my fear of moving out of my comfort zone if I truly acted as Jesus would.

That said, would Jesus have a blog? Or rather, should I, trying to do as Jesus would, have a blog? I'm still thinking and praying. Mayhap the question is not so much, should I blog, but what should I blog? Methinks my posts so far have been shallow, if entertaining, but of no consequence. Of course, it doesn't help that I have a readership of about 2, but then again, do I write to please man or God? I write to please myself mainly.

The above is part of what has been going through my head these past few days. For more mixed-up thinking than this, click here. <--this article is almost ridiculous in its contradictions and outrageous claims. I read (past tense) it for school.

Speaking of school, college physics has begun. I won't say much about it yet. I need to observe a couple more times before announcing my opinion of physics, my prof., and other students.

p.s. no Ireland pics yet. too busy this summer. I probably won't blog about Csehy, VBS, wedding, etc. Suffice to say I did all that and moved house.

Ireland abbreviated

2007-07-10T20:41:00.000-04:00

Ireland is the most beautiful country I've visited yet. I am so gonna move there one day.

I half promise a longer post tomorrow on Ireland and possibly pictures. Half promise because it depends on my energy level and to-do list. Possibly pictures because my laptop/memory card stuff isn't working right now. As in, they're not working together. They work separately, but not together.

I just realized the time stamp is still wrong. grrrness. unintelligent computer.

I'm off to watch Mary Poppins...my mum and bro think that's the best thing to keep me up so I don't succumb to jet lag.

Oh, btw, I think I "lost" part of my birthday day because of the time difference between the States and Ireland.

a day in the life of a serfy

2007-06-19T20:25:00.001-04:00

I ate a lot of food today.

I played Frisbee and catch with Steve.

I ran around sweating in jeans.

I got a cramp from hiding in a cupboard/shelf.

I told four other people Why I Believe That God Exists.

I set a new personal record for pogosticking - 120.

I lost a game of foosball against my dad.

I sight-read Rachmaninov's Prelude Op.23 No.4.

And that is basically what I've done today so far.

Yesterday I found a grammatically incorrect sentence in my physics book. "The gas pressure we are most familiar with is that of the atmosphere." It should be "The gas pressure with which we are most familiar is that of the atmosphere."

I do too have a life.

unintelligentness

2007-05-30T15:42:00.001-04:00

I was halfway done with this post on got shrimp? until I realized I was writing on the wrong blog. so anyway...

it's that time of year again. National Spelling Bee time. Semifinals tomorrow live on ESPN 10am-1pm and finals on ABC 8pm-10pm (or later =]).

The Trenton Times champion, Connie Wen, didn't advance to the third round. I think she probably scored too low on her written tests, as she spelled her second round word right.

I think I'll be rooting for Matthew Evans, Samir Patel, and Jonathan Horton. We shall see. If they make it to ESPN, which they probably will.

People actually make bets on who will win the Spelling Bee. unintelligent!

Update: The last person from NJ, Robert Hale, has er...been eliminated, for lack of a nicer way of putting it. So no hope for NJ this year. And he's sponsored by Kerry's newspaper too... But Samir, Matthew, and Jonathan are still in. Tomorrow on ESPN!! can't wait!

Sunday

2007-05-13T21:53:00.000-04:00

At the benefit concert on Wednesday Mr. Wadley sang a really cool song by Stephen Sondheim, titled Sunday. It talks about an artist and the way he sees the world..."green, purple-yellow-red grass". yeah...pretty awesome.

So Stephen and I had to stay at church after service and choir for a couple hours while Mum and Dad had a drama rehearsal. We were mucking around outside by the creek. Having fun in general, splattering cress on each other (totally by accident, according to Stephen) and whatnot. I was in a skirt and silver heels. Fortunately my shoes have not suffered great damage. Anyway, we were trying to clear up some of the debris so the water would flow better. Hence the following conversation.

Me: So what do you propose we do?

Stephen: Dam it.

Me: WHAT did you say?

Stephen: Dam it.

Me: Oohhh...dam it. I thought you meant...you know, the bad word.

That's my brother for you. And he didn't even realize it.

Oh, then in the process of damming it, I dropped a plank on my foot, so now it hurts quite a bit.

what a wonderful world sigh

2007-05-04T21:12:00.000-04:00

I feel peevish. yes, peevish, not peeved. peevish is a very fitting word. just looking at it makes me feel annoying. I'm annoying and annoyed. I'm annoying myself and the people around me and the people reading this. My blog really has no purpose.

stupid wrists.

Is $16.99 too much for a pair of (modest) shorts? I am feeling conscience-stricken. because I bought a pair of shorts for that price today. and I normally don't buy jeans for that much.

I am also having spelling problems today.

NJJCL convention tomorrow. woot? maybe. I don't feel up to it.

spent half an hour trying to figure out the piano intro to Awesome God.

I had not very good iced coffee today. from dunkin' donuts too. I am disappointed.

nervousness, adrenaline, elation, HUZZAH!

2007-04-26T23:10:00.000-04:00

Today was just awesomely fun. It was interesting watching the *ahem* different interpretations of Shakespeare's plays. I am sooo thankful that we got this opportunity to perform at Shakesperience: NJ. I'm especially happy because I went with an amazing group of friends and actors. To show you exactly how amazing they are, I'll post some pictures...one day. hehe. Anyway, we got the most awards (I think) out of all the groups. My favorite is the Best Ensemble, or Gasp! Award. Huzzah!

And I'm still thinking about the script. Stevie and I were reciting it in the car. I memorized the whole thing, even though I'm just the stage manager. =]

I can't wait for next year!!

To bed, to bed, to bed. - Lady Macbeth

cuckoo business

2007-04-11T22:35:00.000-04:00

Just to clarify: I'm not saying I'm going to give up any notion of a career in music. What I was saying is that maybe that's not the way God wants me to go, and that I shouldn't get too hung up on piano.

I think I'm losing my voice. sort of. It gets really raspy towards the end of the day.

I never knew that three people could generate a whole laundry basket full of dirty clothes in 24 hours.

Dad and Stephen and I were talking about naming objects today. I named our kitchen chairs Clark, Gable, Lewis, Sacagawea, Kent and C. And I named three identical bowls Bill, Bob, and Joe.

Today was a pretty fun day.

That sounds really blah. I feel sort of blah.

the state of the wrist

2007-04-06T14:32:00.000-04:00

Three months and eleven days have passed since I sprained my wrists. I'm still not up to regular piano practicing. As in the amount of hours I put in each day. Yesterday I finally found out that I didn't win in my most recent piano competition. I didn't expect to win, but a part of me thought I had the slightest chance. I could have worked a bit harder without straining my wrists. But putting in a little extra effort still wouldn't have guaranteed the results I wanted.

Right now, I really regret my decision to try snowboarding. Though I've been wondering lately if God is trying to tell me something. Reminding me to rely on Him, and to trust His plans for my life. That my life may not take the course I've planned. Maybe I won't have a career in music after all.

On a very different note, I have an extremely annoying habit of saying I've attached something in an email and sending it without the attachment. It's already happened four times this week.

random thoughts on random things

2007-03-28T18:26:00.000-04:00

Has it ever struck you what a funny word "random" is? If you separate the syllables it becomes "ran" and "dom". I wonder why random means what it means. I wonder why I'm too lazy to look up its etymology.

I wonder many random things, which is why I'm such a random person.

Sometimes I annoy Myself. Then I tell Myself to shut up, which isn't very nice, but Myself doesn't mind much.

My hope is built on nothing less,
Than Jesus' blood and righteousness;
I dare not trust the sweetest frame,
But wholly lean on Jesus' name.
On Christ the solid Rock, I stand,
All other ground is sinking sand.

How true those words are! Oftentimes I feel betrayed, even over the smallest things, by my friends. Maybe betrayed is a bit strong, but even the people I hold dearest let me down sometimes. I'm sure I let others down too, without knowing it.

I like using archaic terms like "wherefore" and "thereupon" and "inasmuch". They look like small words smushed together.

Is it wise to pack a bag of chips in your suitcase? no. especially if you're going to Hong Kong.

Spring break is coming. And I'll be stuck in the house with two specimens of the male species. Namely, my brother and my dad. My mom will be gadding off to Hong Kong. Lucky duck! I'm going to need some serious girl time. Anyone (girls only, please) wanna go shopping? Wait, shopping is stressful. Oh, and did I mention I'm going to have to cook and clean and do laundry?

I like sarcasm, to a certain extent.

Favorite phrases as of this week: "You lucky duck!" "...to a certain extent" "cuckoo!"

ok I'm done. Now you know how random I can be.

Certamen and diet Coke

2007-03-20T21:49:00.000-04:00

Congrats to the Owl Academy Level 1 Team! Awesome job, y'all!

I saw three people from my church at Certamen today, but to my discredit, I didn't say hi to any of them. I'd have never known they took Latin though.

I have inferred from my studies of humankind that diet Coke has adverse effects on your psychology. People who drink excessive amounts of diet Coke and/or constantly drink diet Coke are in general, lazier, weirder, and more sarcastic than people who don't drink diet Coke. Really, I could cite numerous examples (Mr. Malvar being the only exception I know of) to back up my hypothesis. I mean, deduction. I'm not planning to prove my assertion.

I love people-studying. It helps to pass time.

icy snow

2007-03-17T10:55:00.000-04:00

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

and Happy Ice/Snow Day!

Why is there snow on St. Patrick's Day, but no snow on Christmas Day? Something's wrong with this picture.

"What's wrong with the picture I'm looking at?" -- Mrs. Hadland, one of the ABS tour managers

That's what she always says when any of the boys forget to zip up their coats or tie their shoes.

~~I want to go sledding, but Stevie and Uri are on tour and today is Raphi's Sabbath. So I have no one to go sledding with.~~ Just came back from sledding with my dad. The snow conditions actually aren't that bad even though it's starting to melt with the sun.

Maybe I'll just stay in and finish Bleak House.

Last night Dad and I had a nice tramp around the neighbourhood. We were making strange tracks, walking backwards and sideways and all that.

An eighth grader from Montgomery won the Regional Spelling Bee this year. I had a feeling she would win when I left after the sixth round.

The time stamp is all wrong because of DST.

41 Things to Do If You Have Too Much Time On Your Hands

2007-03-16T17:44:00.000-04:00

Play all the hymns in the hymnal.
Take out all the tissues from the box.
Fold them all up and put them back in the box.
Sing "I Know a Song that Gets on Everybody's Nerves"
Write sappy sonnets to your imaginary beloved.
Cut your hair really really short.
Bake cookies and add salt instead of sugar.
Dial every single phone number you can think of.
Build a life-sized bed out of gumdrops and toothpicks.
Erase a blank sheet of paper until either the paper or the eraser is worn out.
Get a high score on every single game on orisinal.com.
Pull all the buttons off a calculator, then stick them back on.
Unpeel a clementine, eat the inside, then glue the peel back together and put it with the other clementines.
Measure the area of your room using the length of your pinky as the unit.
Sharpen an unused pencil until it's down to a stub.
Play pictionary with yourself.
Rearrange all the furniture in your room.
Write all your words backwards - ekil siht.
Make a paperclip chain with all the paperclips in the house.
Pour out all the lotion in one bottle.
Invent a cure for the common cold.
Draw concentric circles on the driveway with chalk.
Organize your brother's Pokemon cards in alphabetical order.
See how many holes you can punch in one piece of paper.
Count the stars.
Fry an ice cube.
Read the whole Encyclopedia Britannica.
Make a suit of armour out of aluminium trays.
Look for the pot of gold at the end of a rainbow.
Push all the buttons in an elevator - and stay in the elevator.
Count the number of Rice Krispies in one box.
Reset all the clocks in the house 12 hours ahead.
Eat a frozen TV dinner.
Cut down a big tree with a 2-inch pocketknife.
Run a cake of soap under water until it has totally melted.
Practice balancing a baseball on your nose.
Play all of Chopin's waltzes backwards.
Calculate the number of seconds you waste each day.
Search for a five-leaf clover.
Eat raw oats.
Write a list titled "51 things to do if you have to much time on your hands".

the purpose of my blog

2007-03-15T21:32:00.000-04:00

Before you read any further, let me tell you the purpose of this post. The purpose of this post is to show you how very purposeless my blog is. Having said that, let me proceed.

The other day I was talking (well, emailing) with Artemis about her getting a blog. And she said something about needing to find a purpose for a blog in order to get a blog. That made me think about the purpose of my blog. Which in turn led me to the conclusion that I really shouldn't have a blog, since my blog is purposeless and directionless. I'm not an activist of any kind, I don't write seriously about deep subjects, this web page is certainly not my online journal, and I'm not here to meet new friends (which, by the way, is the dumbest reason ever for having a blog).

So, why do I even bother? Because it's a place for me to post my random thoughts without getting interrupted. I mean, if I was saying this to anyone, in person, he or she would probably zone out or change the subject. Though technically I have no power to force anyone to read this whole thing. But at least it's a place where I can show off my witless humor without seeing people laugh at me. See, even if you're laughing at my words right now, I wouldn't know, and since ignorance is bliss, I should be happy.

I am so annoying myself. I'd better get back to work before I cause more damage.

conversations of the week

2007-02-22T09:29:00.000-05:00

Ryan: "GUESS WHAT?!?"

Serfy: "what?"

Ryan: "I ATE A PENNY!!!"

Serfy: "that's nice."

Ryan: "You wanna know how I ate the penny?"

Serfy: "not really..."

Ryan: ~describing how he was sucking on the penny, then Thomas made him laugh, and then he swallowed it, and then...~ "...I started running around like a turkey without a head!!"

hmm...isn't it chicken without a head? I didn't argue the point with him, because Thomas came by and started telling me how once he'd swallowed a penny.

It doesn't sound as funny as the real thing...I'm not good at transposing conversations. but whenever Ryan sees me he's always like "GUESS WHAT?!?" and he goes on to tell me something strange he did/is doing.

Serfy: ...so what does Joe D'Avanzo look like?

CJ: He's about this short, really fat, and he has an afro.

Uri: No, he looks like Max.

Max: Stop it! I'm trying to concentrate!

CJ: Actually he does look like Max, sorta like a hippie, with long hair...

ridiculous boys.

welcome home

2007-02-21T13:56:00.000-05:00

My brother is back!! Yay! We had a nice long talk at ABS after he came back. He watched Pirates of the Carribean. I was like, ?!?!? Which means I'm allowed to watch it now, since he watched it without permission. =]

Last weekend we went down to Virginia to see Stephen's last two concerts. It was so amazing to see my little brother up on stage singing with the CC. The whole choir is awesome, but it's just sort of mind-blowing to see my little brother part of it.

And in VA, I met up with one of my friends from the Spelling Bee last year.

Tour pics! Mostly from Sunday morning going from Harrisonburg to Richmond.

On Monday mom spent the whole day at ABS, organizing the boys' stuff. They're going to live in a convent. Rather interesting place to be, don't you think? Ettl is structurally sound, but no one is allowed to live in it. I feel really bad for some of the boys...they're confused, sad, stressed out, etc. At least they have a mandatory free this weekend so they can go home and regroup.

I'm writing like a scatter-brained chicken. Whatever. Just look at the pictures. =]

as you wish

2007-02-15T21:32:00.000-05:00

Happy [late] Valentine's Day! I hope your Valentine's Day was filled with true love, just like Buttercup and Westley. *sigh* How romantic! No, really, not necessarily romantic love, or that "warm, fuzzy feeling(you mean like hot chocolate?)", but genuine brotherly and familial love.

I love Valentine's Day. Why? Because of all the funny things people say on that day. Not the phrases you see on the nasty tasting candies, but the "I hate Valentine's Day!"s. I guess I love hearing people say that because I disagree with them, and I love disagreeing with people.

Check this out. Very interesting results.

"Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die." <--from the funniest movie ever. "I'm not left-handed either." Awesome fencing sequence. The only disappointing factor was that Buttercup is too much of a damsel in distress. I mean, what sort of woman just stands and gawks while her beloved is being attacked by a Rodent of Unusual Size? Oh, and did I mention that the plot is totally implausible?

Writing is very therapeutic for me.

you asked for it

2007-02-10T18:01:00.000-05:00

This has been a grawumpus week, as someone in some book said. Yesterday I asked God for an uneventful day, and guess what he gave me? A weekend full of surprises. And some of them weren't exactly pleasant.

So first my debate partner ditches, I mean, she had to miss debate class. That wasn't too bad. Then after debate, Mommy tells me that the ABS dorms flooded. When we get home we find out that our Girlchoir manager broke her ankle. And today I got a call saying that I have to play piano for Junior Worship tomorrow because the girl who's supposed to do it is stressed out. And I'm not stressed out because I only have to finish my VBS application essay, my Sunday school homework, my CWG essay, half of my Latin, and practice the piece I'm accompanying for choir tomorrow. And because I'm folding random ABS boys' clothes and sorting their soaked possessions.

I know this sounds cliched (yes, I know it's trite), but life is not fair.

BUT. God must have a purpose in doing this. I just can't figure it out yet.

It's funny, but I don't feel very stressed out anymore.

life as an only child

2007-01-28T21:47:00.000-05:00

So...Stephen's been gone for 4 days. He's currently in North Carolina. I am bored to death (or something near extreme boredom) by myself. There's no one to understand my corny jokes, no one to argue over the piano with, and no one to fight with. And no one for my mom to scold. So she scolds me because I make too much noise. Which I am doing to make up for the normal noise level when Stephen is around.

Online sarcasm is hard to perceive. Which is why it's exasperating.

You know, beginning sentences with "which" is very bad grammar.

My concert today went tolerably well. I felt that it was sort of blah. Nothing extraordinary. I love singing in Richardson Auditorium though. It has such chine-spilling acoustics. I love being Mayor what's-his-name from Homer Price.

Letters are so much more real than emails.

Nonsense is the best sense in the world.

WTC

2007-01-23T16:25:00.000-05:00

No, not the world trade center. Winter Tour Choir. Stephen's going on tour this Thursday. quite unexpected. for three weeks. I'm going to miss my bestest friend. It feels sort of like he's going to college before I am. My parents are really awesome and all, but they just can't make up for Stevie. So if you see me moping around for the next few weeks you'll know why. One advantage: I get my own room for three weeks. and my own bathroom. =]

Unfortunately Stephen will have to miss my girlchoir performance this weekend. Though I don't think he minds much. He gets to go to Disneyworld. Not that I mind much. I think it's a bit overrated. And I'm not being spiteful.

I bought a prettiful shirt on Sunday. It's covered in music notes! And it's blue.

I just read my post and it sounds like two different people wrote it. but then again I'm a girl and you know how girls' minds continually jump from one subject to another.

My mom is on a Macbeth craze. That's basically all she thinks about these days. She's watched at least 3 versions and listened to 2 others. In fact she's watching one right now. I can hear people getting killed.

Life is so not boring.

I am not being sarcastic.

My life is extremely colorful.

lessons learned on the 12th of January 2007

2007-01-12T23:30:00.000-05:00

It is not fun to have a stuffy and runny nose. In fact, it is quite annoying.

It is not fun to have a deep cat scratch on top of your sprained wrist. In fact, it is quite painful.

It is not fun to have no evidence against the affirmative's plan. In fact, it is quite pitiful.

It is not fun to try to outsing your brother the singer. In fact, it is quite hurtful to the vocal cords.

quote of the day:

"Do you feel died?"
-Stephen Fung

blogger vs. xanga

2007-01-09T19:07:00.000-05:00

blogger is waayy cooler than xanga. it doesn't have all those annoying ads, and I can upload edited photos more easily.
Thank you cards are amazingly hard to write.